You Shook Me All Night Long - AC/DC 5:53 PM


A Solution For World Peace And Possible Bullpen Help For The Sox

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That's Muntader al-Zaidi, reporter for Al Bahgdadia, tossing a couple of what look like split fingered fast shoes at President Bush. Apparently not everyone thinks Iraq is "freer and safer" than it was eight years ago. After being asked why he thinks he was targeted by the footwear assassin Bush answered, "The guy wanted to get on TV and he did. I don't know what his beef is, but whatever it is, I'm sure someone will hear it."

If the president doesn't know then who does? This guy's country is blown to bits and being controlled by "American Independent Contractors" and a bunch of the President's business buddies he's paying back for loaning him the money to get into office. They didn't give a shit about a people who were living under a psycho bitch dictator for more than 30 years and finally were able to control their own destiny. They were psyched because they hit the lottery under the guise of building a democracy. Anybody who questioned their no bid contracts were called "terrorists". You think living without power, cable, video games, lights, heat and running water for a few days after an ice storm is tough? Try 6 years and probably more. Bush is lucky this guy wasn't wearing a dynamite vest that are so in fashion in that area of the world. Instead he was assaulted with practical footwear. If only the insurgents were throwing their shoes at our troops. We could retaliate with trucker bombs or a Detroit Red Wings style Octopus.

I've always advocated the use of non-lethal weapons for war or to make political statements. Remember when Bill Gates was hit with a pie in Belgium?

Nobody was hurt.(physically anyway) The "terrorist" group got their message across, although I'm not sure what that was. And the world had a good laugh for a few minutes. Instead of killing or physically harming someone, humiliate them! It will be on the Internet within seconds and the victim will have to deal with his buddies giving him a hard time about it for the rest of his life. Could you imagine the next state funeral? "Hey Cool Whip, how was Iraq?",  "I heard you got CREAMED in the polls!", "At least you weren't hunting with Cheney". Plus, cream pies are delicious.

Also, check out the arm on al- Zaidi. Two fast balls(shoes) high and tight. Theo Epstein should send a scout to the Iraqi prison he's being held in and see if he's got any other pitches up his battered sleeve. We could use the bullpen help.