This is Danielle's Blog!

Tomorrow is my birthday... and if you'd like to get me a gift, you can help me take care of more animals.  I love the work I do with my fosters and my critical care animals.  It gets very expensive.

Is that weed, son?  No officer, it's just a moldy fry...


It was Ouija Wednesday!  The boys messed around with the board, and I hid in the other room.  Sure, maybe that isn't enough to protect me, but I wanted nothing to do with being in here.  

Is this Nation of Pussies?  This Yankee fan is SUING ESPN for making fun of him for falling asleep during a Yankees game... to the tune of $10 million.  We think this won't even go before a judge...

For your viewing pleasure:


Great White shark attacks swimmer in Manhattan Beach, CA!

This is Dan Maurer.  He's got a tumor in his scrotum that is causing it to weigh 100 pounds.  Hear about his story here:

So many fab things for you to waste time with this morning:


A guy was at a restaurant in Koh Samui, Thailand, and had his phone stolen by a monkey.

Ahhh Monday, time once again for another visit to Masshole Theater!

Are you sick of wearing thongs and G-strings because they're just too BULKY, too conservative, and cover you up too much?  Here's your answer . . .

Florida, not like the rest of us... a young boy - 4 years old to be specific - was found wandering around an apartment complex at 2:30 in the morning the other day.

Viagra... it's a bitch.  Old people everywhere are over-the-top frisky.  One Japanese man is in trouble with the law for allegedly stalking an 80-year-old woman he met while his now-deceased wife was in the hospital.

Top priority today is to hear what Shawn Thornton had to say about NOT being re-signed by the Bruins:

This can't be real, right?  This was Greg's son Breese's Father's Day card to him:

Happy 90th birthday 41!  Here's another reason why Greg doesn't want to get old:  


Men, would it igg you out to get back to a chick's place and see a bed full of stuffed animals?

The President is in town today to speak at Worcester Tech's graduation.  You've been warned.  Find road closures and restrictions here.  

Can you believe it has been 20 years since the murders of Ron Goldman and Nicole Brown Simpson?  Now, depending on your age, you might say "wow...

Imagine this... you're a parent, and your kid is a little... "disturbed," shall we say.  She writes some dark, disturbed things in a journal... maybe struggles a bit with some mental issues.

If you're into elderly porn, like Mike Hsu (NOT LIKE MIKE HSU!), then you will love this.  This kid from GA loves to date the older ladies.  Here he is with his 91-year-old girlfriend Marjorie.  HE'S 31.

Do you think it's possible, in 2014, that random people are taking minute-long videos of the President working out?  Even after the Secret Service has swept the whole hotel in Poland AND the gym?