Icky Thump - The White Stripes 9:11 PM


Friday 5-30-14 Recap!

"Modern Family" star Eric Stonestreet accused KISS' Gene Simmons and Paul Stanley of being jerks to his mom on a recent flight.  Eric wasn't there . . . but he didn't like what his mom had to say about it.  In an Instagram post, Eric said:

Gene is vehemently denying that he did anything inappropriate on Twitter, and called Eric's claims, quote, "blatantly untrue."  He added, quote, "Look, I have a mother, too.  I'd never be mean, especially to mothers.  You know that."  Eric didn't buy it . . . and responded, quote, "I'm going to go ahead and believe my 70-year-old mom on this one.  You should continue to make HER the aggressor though.  It's a good color on you.”  Eric said he'd let it go if Gene would just apologize, but Gene vowed to, quote, "stand by his words."  Paul was less defiant.  He Tweeted, quote, "I actually waited so your mom could get off first.  The rest [is] a misunderstanding of joking.  I apologize anyway.  Good son."  Eric accepted, and added, quote, "Thank you . . . I will tape my glow-in-the-dark KISS posters back together now."  Eric didn't smooth anything over with Gene though, he just sarcastically Tweeted, quote, "I assure you, I will have a stern talk with my mom about making up stories.  Old people, ya know?  OUR apologies.  :)"


There's obviously HUGE money in inventing a better condom.  And by better, I mean one that makes sex FEEL better.  If it's safer, that'd be nice too, but whatever.  An inventor in Los Angeles named Charles Powell says he's invented the newer, better condom . . . and the highlight is that it barely covers you at ALL.  First you wrap your junk near the top in a transparent cone-shaped FILM with an opening.  You can leave it on for hours or days and won't notice it.  Then when it's time to have sex, you stick a little adhesive cap on JUST the very tip.  He calls it 'the Galactic Pregnancy Prevention Cap.'  Or G-Cap for short.  Powell says it solves the problem of people putting on condoms wrong because it's easier . . . the cap is stronger than a normal condom and less likely to break . . . and it'll feel better because the rest of your junk is exposed.  Obviously, that means it doesn't do anything to prevent STDs, so safe-sex experts aren't down.  And it'll still take a lot of testing before it hits the market. 


You know why you hate Gwyneth Paltrow.  I know why I hate Gwyneth Paltrow.  But why does Cindy McCain, wife of Senator John McCain, hate Gwyneth Paltrow?  It's because of comments Gwyneth made earlier this week at some tech conference, saying that being bullied online as a celebrity is like being at WAR.  She said, quote, "It's almost like how, in war, you go through this bloody, dehumanizing thing, and then something is defined out of it."  Well, Cindy LIT HER UP on Twitter for that, saying, quote, "Gwyneth Paltrow is a joke.  Her life is like taking bullets for a soldier.  What a joke!  My 2 sons serving in the military should talk to her.  "Perhaps [she] should go out on patrol with some soldiers.  Kind of like a Red Carpet in her mind I guess!"


Greg was stalked by a wild creature yesterday.  A HOUSE CAT!  (What do you think it is?)

Have a great weekend!  We're back Monday with an ALL NEW Masshole Theater!



(Blog list image:  Flickr/ Courtney Walker)