Vivid Entertainment has been cranking out the Superhero Porn Parodies like nobody's business as of late. They've taken on Superman, Spiderman, and even dared George Lucas legally with their excellent Star Wars parody that includes hot Ewok action. "Alex Braun's Avengers XXX A Porn Parody" is a Nerd delight. Not only because it has hot porn chicks dressed up as Superheroes, but it also includes MORE Superheroes than the actual Avengers movie. There are appearances by Spider Man(Xander Corvis), Spider Woman(Jenna Presley), The Scarlett Witch(Danni Cole), Ms. Marvel(Lexi Swallow), and She-Hulk played by former WWE Star Chyna who was made for the role.
Unfortunately there is no Super-Orgy. Imagine the Earth shaking power of a Super Power session with Hulk, Black Widow, Iron Man, Nick Fury, Ms. Marvel, Spider Woman. I was also hoping for a Hulk Vs. She-Hulk slam session with tumbling buildings and earth cracking jack hammer action. But no such luck.
Despite not including my nerd fantasies this is a hilariously entertaining film. It has a Classic, loosely threaded Porn plot, great lead in lines to the sex scenes like Ms. Marvel telling Nick Fury, "You are really excited by this aren't you? Well, were going to have to do something about that." I love it! Yeah, I know, why the hell am I paying attention to what there saying and not fast forwarding to all the sex? Because it's great seeing things like Spider Man giving Hawkeye the finger(the gesture) and The Scarlet Witch explaining her powers in that sweet ditzy porn star voice. Also, I noticed during the first sex scene between Black Widow and Hawkeye the audio of the various actions was amplified or embellished to the point of almost being louder than the dialogue. Obviously because using super powers during sex makes it much louder.
Most of the costumes are pretty good for the budget they're working with although Iron Man's mask looked like the one you get when you buy the bag costume at The Halloween Outlet. And all the female costumes are thankfully much tighter and more ill fitting than in the Comic Books. Chyna is a natural for She-Hulk, painted up green all over. Even She-Hulks vajajay is green on the outside as we see in her scene with Thor. On a side note, I'm pretty sure She-Hulk didn't wear 80's style Reeboks with scrunchy sox. Also, you would think Thor would be as huge as his Hammer. But the Gods must have given all the size to Loki.
The hottest scene by far is the Super-Lesbian hook up between Ms. Marvel and Scarlett Witch. The scene takes place in what seems to be The Avengers' make- shift basement gym where both happen to be exercising. See, even Superheroes have to hit the gym. Who knew? It's amazing how Scarlet Witch keeps her Headgear on through the whole scene which gets quite acrobatic at times.
Ms. Marvel also seduces Spider-Man who has the voice of a 35 year old smoker and not a teenage Peter Parker. Spider Man keeps his mask on the whole time which makes for interesting cunnilingus. I was hoping the scene would include him hauling Ms. Marvel up to the ceiling or having the money shot spray from his wrists, but again, it's not about my perverted Comic Book fantasies.
Much like the other real Marvel movies they leave the end open for a sequel which I'm sure will be cranked out in the next couple of months. Overall it was pretty good. It took me four sessions to make it through the whole thing...because it's almost two hours long. Plus there's a boner..I mean bonus disc full of extra features I haven't even gotten to yet. Once the chaffing goes away I'll get to it.
