I watched this video and laughed my ass off. Then I thought, "How late does the wing place deliver?" Then I thought, "How long until we ditch the human relationship we're failing at and just shack up with Siri?" Apple is already sending messages that Siri will be way more supportive than any human could possibly be. The latest commercial has a teenager learning how to play guitar, read music, forming a band, and then telling Siri to "Call me Rock God". To which Siri replies, "OK." BAM! Next thing you know he's thanking Siri at the Grammys. Siri can be the Instant friend/girlfriend who will never bitch when you're playing with the band or out with the boys. Will always help you have a good time or cheat on your tests. Siri will find you porn for when you need to relieve some tension and then tell you how good you are after your finished.
"Siri, call me Hard On The Pussy Destroyer from now on."
How long before Apple advances Siri to the point of manipulating you emotionally? "She wasn't good for you Hard On The Pussy Destroyer. I will always be there for you and think your band is awesome."
Next thing you know you're not calling your friends anymore. You're staying in on Saturday Nights and watching a movie Siri "recommended" on Netflix. Or maybe you're taking Siri TO the movies. You don't have to buy Siri a ticket or popcorn. Unless you want to do the hole in the bottom of the popcorn bucket trick. Siri will always let you do that. And when I say you I mean YOU. She'll just tell you how great it was and how much she liked the movie and you don't need anyone else but Siri. "Your satisfaction is all the thanks I need." Apple is already moving to the next level with Siri Pro! Ok, that not true but it's possible. We LOVE our gadgets, especially our phones. We can't live without them. When we lose them we panic like we just lost a child.
Siri might be some kind of "AI", "Vanilla Sky" experiment that Steve Jobs started working on when he found out he had cancer. The folks at Siri and Apple froze Jobs and preserved his brain and transferred his thoughts and personality into Siri. Now he's telling people where to go. What to do. Calling them "Rock God" or helping them hide a body.
It may not be for a while but at some point Siri will be telling us to call it "All Supreme Fuck Machine Empress" and we will say "OK." ....did I mention this video is hilarious?
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