At the CES(Consumer Electronics Show) in Las Vegas, companies from around the world get to show off the latest gadgets that will make your life much easier..or dumber. The video below features three new products that will make us even more dependent on our favorite technology.
The first is an Eye Tracking Sensor that enables your computer to know where you are looking on the monitor. You'll be able to eliminate that exhausting practice of moving your mouse by hand to the point you want. Praise Jeebus! Now all they need is a feature that will click for you when you wink. That way I can utilize both hands when I'm viewing porn.
The second is a smart phone case that allows you to use the touch screen from the back of the phone. I'm not sure what you would need this unless your fingers are so fat that when your playing a game they cover the whole screen.
That's ok because the next featured gadget will help you thin out those sausage like fingers and remind you to chew your food. The HapiFork is a "Smart Fork" that monitors the speed of your shoveling and reminds you to slow down with a soft vibration. It also keeps data on how long your feeding session is. All this info can be shared to Social Media too! Oh good, I want the world to know how fast I can plough through a lasagna. This is great because humans don't have the ability to remind themselves about this stuff. Food doesn't make fat people, forks make fat people. What this should do is send a taser like shock to let you know you have to stop with all the spaghetti. Maybe a voice reminder that says, "Don't you think you've had enough?" or "Holy Crap where are you putting it all fat ass?"